BushIsAnIdiot
2004-10-10 22:24:51 UTC
PLEASE CONSIDER MY EXPERIENCE WHEN VOTING IN 2004 EXPERIENCE AND EDUCATION
Law Enforcement: I was arrested in Kennebunkport, Maine, in 1976 for driving
under the influence of alcohol. I pleaded guilty, paid a fine, and had my
driver's license suspended for 30 days. My Texas driving record has been
"lost" and is not available. Military: I joined the Texas Air National Guard
and went AWOL. I refused to take a drug test or answer any questions about
my drug use. By joining the Texas Air National Guard, I was able to avoid
combat duty in Vietnam. College: I graduated from Yale University with a low
C average. I was a cheerleader. PAST WORK EXPERIENCE: I ran for U.S.
Congress and lost. I began my career in the oil business in Midland, Texas
in 1975. I bought an oil company, but couldn't find any oil in Texas. The
company went bankrupt shortly after I sold all my stock. I bought the Texas
Rangers baseball team in a sweetheart deal that took land using taxpayer
money. With the help of my father and our friends in the oil industry
(including Enron CEO Ken Lay), I was elected governor of Texas.
ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS GOVERNOR OF TEXAS: I changed Texas pollution laws to
favor power and oil companies, making Texas the most polluted state in the
Union. During my tenure, Houston replaced Los Angeles as the most
smog-ridden city in America. I cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas treasury
to the tune of billions in borrowed money. I set the record for the most
executions by any governor in American history. With the help of my brother,
the governor of Florida, and my father's appointments to the Supreme Court,
I became President after losing by over 500,000 votes. ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS
PRESIDENT: I am the first President in U.S. history to enter office with a
criminal record. I invaded and occupied two countries at a continuing cost
of *over one billion dollars per week*. I spent the U.S. surplus and
effectively bankrupted the U.S. Treasury. I shattered the record for the
largest annual deficit in U.S. history. I set an economic record for most
private bankruptcies filed in any 12-month period. I set the all-time record
for most foreclosures in a 12-month period. I set the all-time record for
the biggest drop in the history of the U.S. stock market. In my first year
in office, over 2 million Americans lost their jobs and that trend continues
every month. I'm proud that the members of my cabinet are the richest of any
administration in U.S. history. My "poorest millionaire," Condoleeza Rice,
has a Chevron oil tanker named after her. I set the record for most campaign
fundraising trips by a U.S. President. I am the all-time U.S. and world
record-holder for receiving the most corporate campaign donations. One of my
best friends, Kenneth Lay, presided over the largest corporate bankruptcy
fraud in U.S. History, Enron. My political party used Enron private jets and
corporate attorneys to assure my success with the U.S. Supreme Court during
my election decision. I have protected my friends at Enron and Halliburton
against investigation or prosecution. More time and money was spent
investigating the Monica Lewinsky affair than has been spent investigating
one of the biggest corporate rip-offs in history. I presided over the
biggest energy crisis in U.S. history and refused to intervene when
corruption involving the oil industry was revealed. I presided over the
highest gasoline prices in U.S. history. I changed the U.S. policy to allow
convicted criminals to be awarded government contracts. I appointed more
convicted criminals to administration than any President in U.S. history. I
created the Ministry of Homeland Security, the largest bureaucracy in the
history of the United States government. I've broken more international
treaties than any President in U.S. history. I am the first President in
U.S. history to have the United Nations remove the U.S. from the Human
Rights Commission. I withdrew the U.S. from the World Court of Law. I
refused to allow inspector's access to U.S. "prisoners of war" detainees and
thereby have refused to abide by the Geneva Convention. I am the first
President in history to refuse United Nations election inspectors (during
the 2002 U.S. election). I set the record for fewest numbers of press
conferences of any President since the advent of television. I set the
all-time record for most days on vacation in any one-year period. After
taking off the entire month of August, I presided over the worst security
failure in U.S. history. I garnered the most sympathy for the U.S. after the
World Trade Center attacks and less than a year later made the U.S. the most
hated country in the world, the largest failure of diplomacy in world
history. I have set the all-time record for most people worldwide to
simultaneously protest me in public venues (15 million people), shattering
the record for protests against any person in the history of mankind. I am
the first President in U.S. history to order an unprovoked, preemptive
attack and the military occupation of a sovereign nation. I did so against
the will of the United Nations, the majority of U.S. citizens, and the world
community. I have cut health care benefits for war veterans and support a
cut in duty benefits for active duty troops and their families -- in
wartime. In my State of the Union Address, I lied about our reasons for
attacking Iraq and then blamed the lies on our British friends. I am the
first President in history to have a majority of Europeans (71%) view my
presidency as the biggest threat to world peace and security. I am
supporting development of a nuclear "Tactical Bunker Buster," a WMD. I have
so far failed to fulfill my pledge to bring Osama Bin Laden to justice.
During the Iraq War and Occupation thousands of American troops were injured
and killed. I did not have the time to attend any of the funerals for our
fallen soldiers but I did have the time to attend more than 43 fundraising
events of the Republican party. RECORDS AND REFERENCES: All records of my
tenure as governor of Texas are now in my father's library, sealed and
unavailable for public view. All records of SEC investigations into my
insider trading and my bankrupt companies are sealed in secrecy and
unavailable for public view. All records or minutes from meetings that I, or
my Vice-President, attended regarding public energy policy are sealed in
secrecy and unavailable for public review.
Law Enforcement: I was arrested in Kennebunkport, Maine, in 1976 for driving
under the influence of alcohol. I pleaded guilty, paid a fine, and had my
driver's license suspended for 30 days. My Texas driving record has been
"lost" and is not available. Military: I joined the Texas Air National Guard
and went AWOL. I refused to take a drug test or answer any questions about
my drug use. By joining the Texas Air National Guard, I was able to avoid
combat duty in Vietnam. College: I graduated from Yale University with a low
C average. I was a cheerleader. PAST WORK EXPERIENCE: I ran for U.S.
Congress and lost. I began my career in the oil business in Midland, Texas
in 1975. I bought an oil company, but couldn't find any oil in Texas. The
company went bankrupt shortly after I sold all my stock. I bought the Texas
Rangers baseball team in a sweetheart deal that took land using taxpayer
money. With the help of my father and our friends in the oil industry
(including Enron CEO Ken Lay), I was elected governor of Texas.
ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS GOVERNOR OF TEXAS: I changed Texas pollution laws to
favor power and oil companies, making Texas the most polluted state in the
Union. During my tenure, Houston replaced Los Angeles as the most
smog-ridden city in America. I cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas treasury
to the tune of billions in borrowed money. I set the record for the most
executions by any governor in American history. With the help of my brother,
the governor of Florida, and my father's appointments to the Supreme Court,
I became President after losing by over 500,000 votes. ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS
PRESIDENT: I am the first President in U.S. history to enter office with a
criminal record. I invaded and occupied two countries at a continuing cost
of *over one billion dollars per week*. I spent the U.S. surplus and
effectively bankrupted the U.S. Treasury. I shattered the record for the
largest annual deficit in U.S. history. I set an economic record for most
private bankruptcies filed in any 12-month period. I set the all-time record
for most foreclosures in a 12-month period. I set the all-time record for
the biggest drop in the history of the U.S. stock market. In my first year
in office, over 2 million Americans lost their jobs and that trend continues
every month. I'm proud that the members of my cabinet are the richest of any
administration in U.S. history. My "poorest millionaire," Condoleeza Rice,
has a Chevron oil tanker named after her. I set the record for most campaign
fundraising trips by a U.S. President. I am the all-time U.S. and world
record-holder for receiving the most corporate campaign donations. One of my
best friends, Kenneth Lay, presided over the largest corporate bankruptcy
fraud in U.S. History, Enron. My political party used Enron private jets and
corporate attorneys to assure my success with the U.S. Supreme Court during
my election decision. I have protected my friends at Enron and Halliburton
against investigation or prosecution. More time and money was spent
investigating the Monica Lewinsky affair than has been spent investigating
one of the biggest corporate rip-offs in history. I presided over the
biggest energy crisis in U.S. history and refused to intervene when
corruption involving the oil industry was revealed. I presided over the
highest gasoline prices in U.S. history. I changed the U.S. policy to allow
convicted criminals to be awarded government contracts. I appointed more
convicted criminals to administration than any President in U.S. history. I
created the Ministry of Homeland Security, the largest bureaucracy in the
history of the United States government. I've broken more international
treaties than any President in U.S. history. I am the first President in
U.S. history to have the United Nations remove the U.S. from the Human
Rights Commission. I withdrew the U.S. from the World Court of Law. I
refused to allow inspector's access to U.S. "prisoners of war" detainees and
thereby have refused to abide by the Geneva Convention. I am the first
President in history to refuse United Nations election inspectors (during
the 2002 U.S. election). I set the record for fewest numbers of press
conferences of any President since the advent of television. I set the
all-time record for most days on vacation in any one-year period. After
taking off the entire month of August, I presided over the worst security
failure in U.S. history. I garnered the most sympathy for the U.S. after the
World Trade Center attacks and less than a year later made the U.S. the most
hated country in the world, the largest failure of diplomacy in world
history. I have set the all-time record for most people worldwide to
simultaneously protest me in public venues (15 million people), shattering
the record for protests against any person in the history of mankind. I am
the first President in U.S. history to order an unprovoked, preemptive
attack and the military occupation of a sovereign nation. I did so against
the will of the United Nations, the majority of U.S. citizens, and the world
community. I have cut health care benefits for war veterans and support a
cut in duty benefits for active duty troops and their families -- in
wartime. In my State of the Union Address, I lied about our reasons for
attacking Iraq and then blamed the lies on our British friends. I am the
first President in history to have a majority of Europeans (71%) view my
presidency as the biggest threat to world peace and security. I am
supporting development of a nuclear "Tactical Bunker Buster," a WMD. I have
so far failed to fulfill my pledge to bring Osama Bin Laden to justice.
During the Iraq War and Occupation thousands of American troops were injured
and killed. I did not have the time to attend any of the funerals for our
fallen soldiers but I did have the time to attend more than 43 fundraising
events of the Republican party. RECORDS AND REFERENCES: All records of my
tenure as governor of Texas are now in my father's library, sealed and
unavailable for public view. All records of SEC investigations into my
insider trading and my bankrupt companies are sealed in secrecy and
unavailable for public view. All records or minutes from meetings that I, or
my Vice-President, attended regarding public energy policy are sealed in
secrecy and unavailable for public review.